Healing Is A Choice
In my young adult life I found myself facing an unplanned pregnancy. I chose the option of abortion.
The long and short of it was my boyfriend did not want to be a father, and threatened to break up with me if I kept the baby. We made the appointment and I had the abortion. When I found myself pregnant again several months later, I didn’t even bother telling him. I just went and had it done. Ironically, the very thing I was trying to save, which was the relationship with the father, didn’t last much longer anyway. But the guilt, regret, and shame from making that choice was a different story.
I justified my choice to murder my unborn children by telling myself that the abortions were so early in the pregnancy that they didn’t really count. I convinced myself it wasn’t really a life at that point. Even years later as a Pro-life counselor I was still holding onto that lie. It wasn’t until the undeniable truth hit me right between my eyes that I finally broke free from it. Let me explain:
Even though it may sound crude, in the early years of Pro-life ministry, before ultrasound was readily available, it was not uncommon for women to legally donate their miscarriages, preserved in jars, as teaching aids to show the various stages of fetal development. While working in Pro-life ministry I came across two such jars. As I examined the little lives cut short, I realized the truth of what I had done, as one of the jars contained a baby at the same stage of development as the two I had aborted. There was no denying the humanity or what I had done: that I had selfishly ended two lives. These weren’t pre-humans as abortion supporters want us to believe. These were human beings…period! There was no middle ground!
In that moment of clarity, the Lord invited me to join Him on a journey towards wholeness. And while the healing didn’t come overnight, it did come.
I began inviting the Lord into the shattered pieces of my heart, those places He was more than able to mend… each and every one. But I first had to let down the walls of protection I had built within, so that the healing could begin.
Healing is a choice. Just as having the abortions was my choice, so too was being healed. I had to actively partner with the Lord to be restored. It was my choice to heal.
There is an art form in Japan known as kintsugi or kintsukuroi, which translates to “joining with gold”. It’s an ancient practice that takes broken ceramic vessels and porcelain figurines and repairs them, attaching the broken pieces with gold, silver, or platinum. The purpose of the technique is to highlight the object’s history by emphasizing its cracks rather than concealing them.
The beauty of the gospel of Jesus Christ is that it is not one of condemnation but restoration. While the wages of sin is death, the gift of God is eternal life in Christ.
2 Corinthians 5:17 says:
“Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old things have passed away; behold, new things have come.”
And, 1 John 1:9 says: “…if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, so that he will forgive us our sins and will cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
Certain choices cannot be undone. Decisions are not without consequences. Though the Lord does not erase those consequences, he can and will repair what’s been broken. He takes shattered vessels and puts them back together. Every crack is treated and reconditioned. Each piece, reset and restored using a mixture of sacred materials. He heals the wounded places and lines them with gold. It’s an act that demonstrates a powerful truth: Even though the past cannot be undone, God can make all things new.
If you are someone who has walked through abortion and are struggling with the emotional after effects of that experience, you can find healing, it truly is your choice to heal!
“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
-Psalm 147:3
The Blame Game
I heard: The “blame game”. Then the Lord said: As such is the tactic of the enemy. For surely he points the finger of blame towards many of My daughters: those of My own who are post-abortive. So though these daughters are guilty of committing the heinous act of abortion, still was it into his trap that they fell, for he enticed them to partner with his lies by making the option of abortion seem like a good idea at the time. Yet because he is not one… Read More
Selfishness Is The Root
Selfishness is the root, plain and simple, even though a myriad of excuses were offered as to why abortion was chosen. Yet when closely examined, each of those reasons given can be traced back to “self”. For surely did she put her own needs, wants, and desires before those of her unborn child. Thus, in selfishness did she act, as it was her own life that she had in view, and none other, when she made the choice to terminate her pregnancy. So while she was thoroughly convinced that,… Read More
Pray Now For The Post-Abortive
A matter of choice A personal decision Thus has the enemy framed his argument so that choosing abortion seems like a reasonable alternative. Rooted in evil A devilish ploy See then has the enemy come in this hour to severely diminish the number of offspring born to man. The weak minded, his target Unsuspecting Easily swayed Surely are their hearts open to his evil suggestion that abortion is their only viable option. His rhetoric, convincing His tactic, unchanged For indeed is “temptation” still his weapon of choice, as he… Read More
Lori's Ministry Background
The Lord first called Lori to step out into ministry as a client advocate in prolife ministry where she provided direct peer and emotional support to women who were facing unplanned pregnancies. As a frontline presence, she encouraged clients toward carrying their pregnancies to term.
She also spent time as a call responder on a pro-life hotline, fielding calls from women all across the globe who found themselves in crisis pregnancies. While serving in pro-life ministry, she also walked alongside women seeking after abortion care by offering empathetic support to facilitate post-abortive emotional recovery.
Recently, the Lord asked her to step out again by starting an after abortion ministry called, My Choice Is Healing, which focuses on helping women heal and recover from their past abortions. She offers one-to-one peer support for those who are carrying unspoken pain, guilt or shame, providing a safe and compassionate space to discover God’s forgiveness and restoration.
